T-Shirts You Don't See....

I've had all these little slogans bouncing around in my head these last few weeks. I am thinking some of them would make great t-shirts or bumper stickers.

1.) It's not me, it's you.
(I actually think I heard this somewhere, so I can't take all the credit. Very true though.)

2.) I worked for The United States Postal Service and all I got was a bad back.
(And this stupid shirt.)

( This is not slander. I really did work for them and I really do have a bad back because of it. Take that, USPS!)

3.) I told my GPS to go to hell. That's how I ended up here.
(Great bumper sticker potential.)

4.) You can't cure stupid. Luckily, I don't have to live with him anymore.

5.) My preschool dropout can kick your honor students ass.

6.) Don't be a douche.

7.) When life hands you lemons just say fuck the lemons and bail!
(Courtesy of 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall'.)

8.) I have more friends on the Internet than IRL.
(If you're addicted to the Internet you know what IRL means.)

9.) Can we make this quick?
I have a farm to get back to. And my mafia needs me.
And I need to get more furniture for my pad in Yoville.

(Don't worry. I can stop anytime I want. Really.)


More additions to come soon. I didn't write these down so I know I am forgetting a few.